People in general love to say that Brett Favre is Superman because of his NFL consecutive starting streak and his ability to rise to the challenge (mostly in years past) and excel. This weekend, if Brett Favre is Superman, this game will be a re-enactment of Superman II with Bills QB Trent Edwards playing the role of General Zod in the fight scene in Metropolis. Kneel before Zod Superman! Random note: In Favre’s early years, it was a well documented fact that he was addicted to painkillers. Maybe Buffalo fans this Sunday could all dress up as a painkiller prescription to see if it throws Favre’s edge off a little. Just a thought.
Buffalo wins 21-16
Detroit (0-7) @ Chicago (4-3)
Detroit has to win a game at some point right? I mean think about it. They have been competitive in most of their games but have just lacked the talent necessary to pull off the wins. Calvin Johnson has been playing great and may end up being star in the NFL. The Lions are due for a win sooner or later. Unfortunately for Lions fans, in this case it will happen later. The game will be close but the Bears will prevail in the end. Cheer up Detroit Lions fans, at least Matt Millen was fired; and you guys are in the running for the number one overall pick. Good times!!
Chicago wins 23-17
Jacksonville (3-4) @ Cincinnati (0-8)
If Jacksonville were playing any other team in the NFL, I probably would have picked that team at home to defeat the Jaguars. That’s how bad things have gotten in Cincy and yet we hear nothing from ownership on the Marvin Lewis front. If you are not convinced of how bad a coach he is, picture this scenario: you are a very wealthy person and it so happens that you are not often home. Therefore, you decide to pay someone to house sit for you during the times that you are away and basically take care of your house while you provide that person with any necessities you feel are required to properly fulfill this task. Now you obviously stop by the house every now and then to see if things are going along smoothly. However, you notice that the house is dirty, your house sitter is inviting guests over who trash your place and ridicule you and your home all the while disturbing the peace in the neighbourhood. So I ask you good people reading this, do you fire his ass once you notice the soon to be irreparable damage or do you keep this person employed for eight weeks going on nine? And you wonder why I am baffled about the Cincinnati Bengals.
Jacksonville wins 24-17
Baltimore (4-3) @ Cleveland (3-4)
When picking NFL games, one rule of thumb is to avoid picking rookie quarterbacks on the road. That is usually a disaster waiting to happen; for further evidence you can look back at Joe Flacco’s performance in Indianapolis a few weeks back. However, Flacco has gotten better and a great defense can travel and play anywhere. That coupled with the fact that Cleveland is coached by Romeo Crennel spells doom for the Browns. Ray Lewis plays the role of Darth Vader to Derek Anderson and tell him after a jailbreak blitz leading to a sack: Derek—followed by silence and then heavy breathing—who is your daddy?
Baltimore wins 20-13
Green Bay (4-3) @ Tennessee (7-0)
If Green Bay can duplicate the same run stopping scheme that Indianapolis used last week against Tennessee, they should have a great shot at winning in Tennessee. Green Bay’s physical corners should be able to out muscle the Titans receivers and sit on their routes. Green Bay’s offense should be able to do just enough in my estimation to win a tightly contested game.
Green Bay wins 23-20
Tampa Bay (5-3) @ Kansas City (1-6)
When I was younger I used to watch Saved by the Bell every Saturday morning and thought the show was cool. One of the main characters was Zach, a young man with charm that never did his homework but would always be able to weasel himself out of trouble. In addition, Saved by the Bell included Slater, who was a Hispanic football player that also knew his way around the girls; and finally we had Screech who was a train wreck waiting to happen. He was goofy, clumsy and at times downright ridiculous. I bring the show up because it reminds me of the AFC West. Denver would be Zach, Slater would be San Diego and Kansas City would be Screech. That being said, would you really pick Screech to win even if he was at home? Right.
Tampa Bay wins 23-16
Saved by the Bell
Arizona (4-3) @ St Louis (2-5)
Remember how Kurt Warner used to play for St. Louis and was somewhat
of a mentor to Marc Bulger? Well times have obviously changed and this reminds me of Star Wars (I’m a geek, so sue me). So here goes the pre-game conversation at midfield:Bulger (playing the role of Anikin Skywalker): I have come to defeat you my former master.
Warner (playing the role of Obi Wan Kinobi): Marc you were like my brother!
Bulger): All lies! You wanted to rule without me and held me back! Now I have the power of the dark side and shall defeat you!
Warner: No Marc! You were the chosen one! I believed in you! I thought you would take us to the Superbowl.
Bulger: Prepare to kneel before me! I will ruin your chances at a postseason run!
For those of you that do not remember, Obi Wan defeats Anikin and leaves him to die with his legs cut off with the heat from the lava slowly burning his body. Translation: Arizona gets a big road win that springboards them for a solid second half run.
Arizona wins 24-21
Houston (3-4) @ Minnesota (3-4)
A Minny
A Minny
A Minny
A Minny
If you are Minnesota fan,
You must be wondering if they have a plan,
But the truth is
It’s a crisis,
The team could lose less,
The coach is clueless,
And right now everything is a mess;
Fixing things, is the test
And this Sunday Houston is the best….
Houston wins 20-17
Miami (3-4) @ Denver (4-3)
If Denver expects to make the playoffs, this is the type of game they need to win. Miami is a good up and coming team, but the Denver Broncos are playing for more. Or are they? Denver’s defense is on the same level as Jack Sparrow’s honesty. It is basically a myth. Some people swear they have seen the Broncos play defense but we have no tangible proof of this. Perhaps one day, we will see something hinting us that Denver can indeed play some defense, until that happens, let’s wait until we see it. For the time being mind you, Denver will invoke the rules of piracy and ask for Parlay!
Miami wins 24-21
Atlanta (4-3) @ Oakland (2-5)
I can just picture Atlanta rapper Lil John traveling to Oakland and performing in the Atlanta locker room before the game his hit son "Snap ya Fingers" and sending the troops off into a frenzy. At the other end of the spectrum, Oakland's local talent involves E-40 and Too $hort; which would probably get the Raiders feeling hyphy (whatever that means) or in the mood to pimp some hoes. Based on that argument alone, I vote that we pick ATL to snatch a win on the road in Oakland.
Atlanta wins 20-17
Dallas (5-3) @ New York Giants (6-1)
I am currently in the midst of reading Boys will be Boys by Jeff Pearlman. I
n the chapter I just finished reading, they detail how the 1990’s Cowboys dynasty was built. Pearlman explains that the Cowboys had traded for Charles Haley that was a certified nut case at that time but was a phenomenal defensive player. Although he very often did some outlandish things that would leave you scratching your head, Haley was a great leader on the field. He picked up on tendencies and shared them with teammates, encouraged his guys and helped them execute. In short, whatever Michael Irvin did for that team in terms of leadership on the offensive side, Haley did the same on the defensive side. Fast forward to this season, there is no player on that defense save perhaps for Zach Thomas that I could see leading that defense and getting them to play at high level. Think of what Michale Strahan did last year for the NY Giants and that should give you an idea of what I mean. Until Dallas develops or brings in someone to direct and pick that team up, they will be an overrated bunch. In contrast, look at the NY Giants. Not the most talented team but they rely on each other through the leadership of their players and tough out games right now better then anyone except Tennessee. I asked Philly for his thoughts on this game:“Here is the perfect opportunity for the Cowboys to show they are for real. If they can beat the Giants in NY, I would consider putting them in the "contender" category. The problem is I don't think they will beat them, especially after what they showed me at home against the Bucs. DAL 17 NYG 31”
Philadelphia (4-3) @ Seattle (2-5)
A few weeks ago, I heard a radio interview of Rasheed Wallace (NBA player that grew up in Philly) who mentioned he was not an Eagles lover. In fact, he referred to them as pigeons. I vote for us to officially rename them the Philadelphia Pigeons. Rolling with the Pigeons theme, I could see Seattle using the song "No Pigeons" by Sporty Thievez during the game......Here's a preview:
Philadelphia returns the kick off to the 30 yard line and now the offense comes out. Donovan McNabb runs a play action only to be sacked on a linebacker blitz by Leroy Hill. Then the song breaks out through the stadium:
“I don’t like no pigeons
cuz they be the girls that gets no dubs from me,
playing the bar dumb broke with her best friend’s coat,
tryin to holla at meeee!”
Despite the motivational ploy, the Seahawks fail to get a win.
Philadelphia wins 24-17
No Pigeons
New England (5-2) @ Indianapolis (3-4)
The Indianapolis Colts may end up missing the playoffs altogether. With that in mind, this game may well end up being the Colts Superbowl. Their hated rival comes to Lucas Oil Stadium hoping to keep their pace and possibly take sole possession of the top spot in the AFC East. The Colts on the other hand get Bob Sanders and possibly Kelvin Hayden back which should help bolster the defense and even possibly spark a run. The Colts fan in me thinks that Peyton Manning has to knock off the rust at some point and start connecting with his receivers down the field in one on one match ups; but realistically that may take another few weeks given the lack of accuracy on Manning’s deep throws. Indianapolis does just enough defensively and offensively to get a win.
Indy wins 23-20
Pittsburgh (5-2) @ Washington (6-2)
Pittsburgh’s offensive line has shown that I will not hold up against pressure. The one thing the Steelers can do to get a win in DC is apply enough pressure on Jason Campbell to force him into committing mistakes. That might be a tall order considering the fact he has taken great care of the ball. In the end, the Skins pull it off and drop Pittsburgh’s record against the NF east to 0-3.
Washington wins 24-20
Last week: 10-4
Overall: 64-50
