Reactions from "Can we hook up?"

-Im all about the phone thing....I HATE TALKIN ON THE PHONE! girls can never get that!! lol
Ben from Montreal, Canada

-lmao!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cid from Montreal, Canada

-1. We Text You Between Noon and 5 P.M.
MR Sley Response: That's just to keep the line of communication open, just a quick flair, to say Ola Senorita! Que Pasa? But that should not be done on a regular basis. I believe in keeping the opposition on their toes. If not, they relax and get sloppy. Obviously, you can't be too vague or else, she'll go to greener pastures. But personally, texting is way too overrated. Direct contact is always better for me!

2.We Schmooze With Your Pals
MR Sley Response: Ah Yes! Clicks, Clans, Crews and Posses! Of Course, I have no problem meeting the entourage because I'm a cool sociable brethren. But the 1 on 3 or 5 ratio can be a good way to mingle and peep their science, but isolate the prey from the herd is key. It's been proven since the dawn of time!!! But get to know shorty's friend is a good move though.

3. We Take You Out During The Day
Mr Sley response: Ain't nothing wrong with sipping Long Island Ice Teas or Sangrias on a Terrace with her or even asking shorty to go handle some errands with you. It will show that you ain't afraid to show yourself with girly girl under Father sun. But remember, shorty has to earn the right to be shown with you during the day. It's all about being classy and good chemistry, because I hate being with a girl who don't know how to handle herself in public, which is why some chicks will get some air time with it's dark! Amen!

4. We Email You
Mr Sley response: Again with the interactive-Web Obsessed communicato. All that has to do with Facebook (wink!), MySpace, Hotmail, Gmail, MSN Web Messenger, Black Planet (wink!)TWITTER!!!! is way overrated like Drew Bledsoe, Shawn Kemp, Sam Bowie and Alexandre Daigle wrapped in one!!! Of course, you get with the sign of the times and send a friendly email to say What up!! What's Happening!. But I wanna see the face, the expressions, the cutie pie smile, size up the waist line. you feel me!!! All in all, it's called testicular fortitude if you got her digits, call her and meet her and have a drink face to face, then later you can practice making f**ck faces. And if she is wifey material, you do the same thing, but on a more moderate fashion. Relate!
Mr Sley from Montreal, Canada

-Muy Solide
Philly from Montreal, Canada

-Guys just suck
Anonymous

-Post is def on point! I feel you on the talking on the phone I can relate to that
DVD from Montreal, Canada

- 1. texts you between 12pm and 5pm
ok but could also mean that he's doing it while he's at work and doesn't want anyone (girlfriend) at home to ask questions

2. willing to hang with your friends
very true

3. takes you out during the day because most of his friends are probably at work

4. emails you instead of calling you (does it while at work)
refer to answer #1
Martine from Ottawa, Canada

Can we hook up?

Here at the SBG blog, we tackle issues ladies and gentlemen. Covering sports is one thing, but nothing stirs up opinions as much as a debate about men and women on any given subject. Don't believe me? Go ask right now what a guys' opinion is of a dude that's been with 40 women in the past year and then ask that same dude what he thinks about a woman that's been with 40 men in the same time span. Once that's done, ask a woman the same question; more often then not, the answers will be completely different. That being said, one of my friends came across this article in the magazine Cosmopolitan and thought I should give it a good read since the dude that wrote it apparently sounds strangely like me. The person in question is Jake Hurwitz and he works for collegehumor.com. The title of his article was 4 Signs A Guy's Into You. Let's have a look at the signs and see if I can relate to Jake.

1. We Text You Between Noon and 5 P.M.
I need all the players and macks to drop me a few lines on this one. Hurwitz argues that anything before Noon might come off as desperate and that a normal dude should have a job. In addition, texting you at that time allows the involved parties to make plans. Anything passed 11 P.M. screams bootycall.


My take: I guess I would agree with Hurwitz's assessment. If you're feeling a girl, you might probably text her somewhere in the middle of the afternoon. The mornings are usually charged with stuff for us men to do like check out boxscores, sports blogs, your facebook, the calls you missed from last night, the new hip hop beats and obviously getting your updates on the SBG blog (wink). So once all that has been accomplished, now might be the time to start dropping lines to the lady you like. Keep in mind, the lady you like is not the hoodrat that all your boys have been with or the chick that gave you action last night. The lady you like is more like a young Scottie Pippen, you see the potential and the ability for her to be able to do it all and that's the girl you want to draft (definition for the women; draft means we want to pick you up and develop you into our franchise player or for lack of a better term, our wifey).


2.We Schmooze With Your Pals
Guys know how much a woman's girlfriends can be influential. So the trick here is to hang out and possibly have a few drinks with the prospect and her friends. The hope is that the friends might loosen up and start sharing embarrassing stories.


My take: This one is fairly interesting. If I'm interested in a woman, I won't necessarily look to impress her friends; however if I do wow them, I obviously hold more appeal to the woman in question. Nevertheless, I wouldn't make it one of my objectives. That's not how I roll but perhaps other guys might want to give me some insight on this one. Maybe other men use this approach.


3. We Take You Out During The Day
If the guy suggests going out for drinks close to his place and then waits for the woman to get tipsy to offer going back to his place, chances are he only wants to get a piece of a$$. Don't expect him to sing Beyonce's "Cater to You" any time soon. On the other hand, if he invites you for lunch or anything that's out in the open, it's very likely that he actually wants to get to know the woman in question.


My Take: I really can't disagree, guys in general think they are like a good professional sports team, basically they will win 75% of the time at home (it's called home court advantage for a reason). On the other hand, if we take you out in the afternoon in public spots, expect a guy that genuinely wants to get to know you. He might invite you to his ball game,(then again, I know dudes that bring a bunch of different chicks to their games, you guys know who you are) or to chill with his friends or just meet up a little walk. Now don't get it twisted though, if he tries to get to know you and you end up giving him what he wants, that doesn't mean he'll call you back. That freaky thing you asked him to do last night might still scare him off (I'm just saying).


4. We Email You
Guys might be dealing with a hectic work schedule and be stressed as hell. So instead of calling you, he might just take the time to email their lady friend as a means to escape stress but also keep the lines of communication open.


My Take: People that know me will testify to you that I hate talking on the phone in general. Between catching my TV shows, watching ball, playing my Playstation 3 games, holding up the SBG fort and hanging out with the dudes, I just don't have the time nor patience to talk on the phone. I can talk maybe for 10 good minutes but afterwards our conversation might get more redundant then Stephon Marbury's career (you know, get to a good team and completely destroy it every time, EVERY TIME!), so I will instead go with the email as a means of communication. It's not that far fetched ladies.

NBA Tonight

On the same night, we get MarshMelo (dude punched and run, c'mon now, the name fits), Flash and Black Mamba. I have this weird feeling we might see these guys go for 40+ points tonight; yes all three of them. I just hope that we're lucky enough to see it happen. Quick note: I pointed this out to Philly and my man Ben the other day; but why would you even suggest that Ronnie Brewer had anything to do with Kobe Bryant's bad shooting game in Game 3? Kobe probably heard that ish and played it over more times then Shaq played "Kobe tell me how my ass tastes" all of last year in his car. For some reason, it's as if people don't understand that you have to leave greatness alone.Think back, there is always some dude dumb enough to test a great player in the playoffs.  George Karl taking shots at MJ in the finals, DeShawn Stevenson and Brendan Haywood throwing verbal jabs at Lebron James and  Isiah Rider saying he should have been an All-Star instead of Eddie Jones. You need toknow when to leave greatness alone. Remember I said that when an Atlanta player starts talking trash with D-Wade tonight and when Posey  puts up a flagrant foul on MarshMelo. 

Pay Attention to the NBA Playoffs people! Just a quick snippet of things to come in the next few days. 

SBG RIP

The season ended yesterday for the Silverback Gorillas. We went into the championship game looking to repeat as champs. This game would be a test of the two best teams in the league. We knew earlier in the season that we would probably be matched up in the finals against the Vets. Our strength was our athleticism and also our ability to score inside. The Vets strength was their ability to also score inside but also give the ball to their go to scorer who delivered for them all season. He finished as the top scorer in the league this season; therefore we would need to focus our efforts on him and also on their big men, especially with G-No being suspended for the game.

I won't get into too many details about the game since this isn't an actual game recap; it is rather a look back at the season that was. Long story short, both teams gave it their best shot and played hard. I cannot fault the effort that my teammates gave. We gave a superb defensive performance from top to bottom. We lost the game due to a failure to execute our offense in the fourth quarter. Too many times we were stuck with the ball in our hands with the shot clock running down and ended up taking a contested shot. For that, credit must go to the Vets defense. They came up with all the plays they needed to win the game, except for one: with the game tied and 11.7 seconds left in the game, we put the ball in the hands of Superstar and asked him to win the game. He went by his guy and took a shot from the top of they key that he missed but that Cid tipped in right before the buzzer. The ref refused to give us the basket. He said the shot came after the buzzer; and yet even the other admitted the shot should've counted. Screwed by the refs? Maybe. But I would rather see it as us not having done enough to let it come down to the refs' call. So on that note, The Silverback Gorillas season has come to an end. We salute the Laval Vets for giving every one in attendance the best game of the year and for winning the title with class. Let’s roll the credits with our exit interview for all the guys that made this season possible…..

Supreme: Although you got hurt in the first game of the season and was forced to miss the regular season and playoffs, your contributions allowed us to grow as a team and become a more mature basketball team.

50: Despite rupturing your Achilles tendon last May, you still came out to the games to support us and contribute in any way, shape or form. You came through for us and always gave us different perspectives on plays and strategies.

Ralph: Throughout the year, you knew how to give us direction and lead us; you took the reigns of our team and made us better.

Philly: You were our enforcer, our brother and our entertainer. When you weren’t on the court fouling the ish out of people, you were the Nate Dogg of SBG videos. You did more guest appearances then anyone and never disappointed. Check that, you never will disappoint.

Robocop: The muscle of the operation. Although you always had something to say, not once did we ever question your commitment to the team. You always looked out for us and made us look for one another.
Darrel: You were our intensity guy throughout the season. You never bitched, moaned or whined. You did whatever we asked of you and we actually took you for granted at times.

G-No: You always listened and gave it all that you had. Whenever you put your hands on your head, we knew that you had given us all you could and then some.

Pirate: If the Gorillas were a snake, you were the head. You directed us and gave us an unmatched confidence.

Qwest: The pretty boy of the crew. When you weren’t busy screaming Boss Game; you were there ready to defend whatever perimeter player we put in front of you. If we needed a long range basket in the clutch, you were our guy.

Cid: Whenever you showed up we won. It only happened once that you showed up and that we lost and it was in the championship game. But you did it all for us and always made it entertaining with your jokes.

Superstar: Your name says it all. All year long, we asked you to defend the best, the quickest, the strongest, the fastest and the cockiest of players; and we asked you to do that while leading us in scoring. Not once was it a problem for you; you always embraced the challenge and did whatever we told you to do because you saw it as our best chance to win.

See you next season……we hope.
SBGTV

Semi-final recap from 04-25 (vs Patriots)

The Silverback Gorillas went in on Saturday facing the biggest challenge of the season. We had to play the Patriots of Sorel; a team that had defeated us twice by double digits this season. The embarrassment was made worse when Dime Magazine's website ran a feature on us (at BallersNetwork.net) calling us Montreal's finest right after the second loss to the Patriots. The second loss was by 20 points on our home court. We made excuses about the losses, but long story short they served us like hot dogs at a baseball game. So we went in to Centre Etienne Desmarteau with vengeance on our minds; whereas they probably thought that it would be a breeze to get to the Finals (this was a playoff semi-final). So let's break down the game playas......


Right before the warm up, the Gorillas huddled up and discussed our coverages for the game. We had trouble defending their inbound plays during the regular season, so we decided to play them zone on every inbound play and man defense on every other possession. The troops agreed and we went into our warm up.


We took a break from our warm up to send a message to each other that only the Wu can really illustrate properly:

"Who come to get you?  None.  They want guns!

I be the first to set off shit, last to run

Wu roll together as one

I call my brother Sun cuz he shine like one"


Are you ready for the game? We certainly were. 


The game started out slow with both defenses giving quick jabs to one another to see how the opponent would adjust. Both teams were able to force turnovers early which resulted in a low scoring first quarter. At the end of the first, we were leading 19-16. One thing that stood out though, every time we ran screens on the inside, our big men got free and scored (quick sidebar: we scored inside at some point and one of our guys gave the ball to the ref, he then proceeded to give us a warning and said that next time we do that it's a technical foul). Unfortunately, we missed a couple of lay ups but we were still able to generate some type of offense. Our biggest problem at that point was our transition defense. At that juncture, I thought Shaq had a better shot at getting back on defense then we did, that's how bad it was. So our poor transition defense allowed them to stay in the game. Halftime score was 35-31 in favor of SBG.


Then, G-No gave one of the best halftime lines (for a game that was still tight) ever; he said: "they know it's game over." And you know what happened after? He got dunked on with the foul. Nah, I'm just playing. We turned up our defensive intensity, got steals, got out on the break and scored. We hit threes,we hit mid range jumpers and we hit lay ups. We raced out to a 50-39 lead. Our swagger was in full effect and we were strutting out on the court like we were Jim Jonesin' (for those of you lacking hip hop culture, it means ballin people).  Then something strange happened: our point god had been worn down by the grind of the game but there were no dead ball situations to allow him to sub out. Even if he's playing on one leg, we still trust him with the keys to our Ferrari because Pirate is OUR guy; no other way to put it. Well the Patriots sensed his fatigue and pounced him and forced a couple of turnovers that powered their 17-6 run that enabled them to tie the game at 56 by the end of the third quarter.


With the game hanging in the balance, and guys having their heads down a little, we looked each other in the eyes and understood that we were all an extension of the other. Message sponsored by Homo's "R" Us, where male bonding happens. On a serious note, not much was said in the huddle; we just told ourselves that we needed to get the job done. Defend, rebound and play smart. We went inside to start the quarter and G-No converted a tough lay up for a 58-56 lead. Then the guys in green (green jerseys) came back and hit a jump shot to tie the game. We come back then turn it over but then immediately stole the ball and found G-No for another conversion. After scoring, G-No took the ball and threw it to the referee who immediately "Rasheed'd him" (if you lack ball cutlure, it means he gave him a technical foul). So with the score being 60-58, dude walked up to the line and converted both free throws to tie the game. But then something weird happened, it's was as if the technical foul unleashed something that hadn't been there the whole game. We came out with Nas' Ether, and by we, I mean Cid.  Super Cid came out with the trash talk, the cockiness, the confidence and the cookies (he yells cookies after every steal, trust me it's hilarious); dude had 10 points in the fourth quarter. Our line from Ether was basically this: "You a fan, a phony, a fake, a pussy, a Stan

I still whip your ass, you thirty-six in a karate class"

We put up a 16-7 run to close out the game SBG style. One problem however did arise from this game: G-No picked up his second technical foul of the season which means he ill be suspended tomorrow in the Championship game against the Vets. G-No is our second leading scorer, leading shot blocker and dunker. There is no way to quantify what his absence will mean to us. But we will try to get it done as a unit.


Quick preview: Silverback Gorillas play tomorrow against the Vets at 11:45 @ Complexe Sportif Jean-Eudes. We both won on our respective home courts during the season. We won the first game by 20 but it was the toughest game we played all year (which says a lot about them). Then when we went to play to their house, we lost on a last second three point shot with Superstar on the bench battling cramps. When we lost that game, their star player  stepped up to us and said: "See you guys in the Finals." That day is tomorrow ladies and gentlemen. Come encourage SBG!!!!

Scattered Thoughts

Scattered thoughts

I woke up today and figured I would just focus on the NBA playoff games for tonight. Then I copped a few tracks (which I will get to after) that screamed "WTF Shyne, it's time for a Scattered Thoughts piece!". So here we are folks, my Scattered Thoughts for the week; although to be honest, it's more like my thoughts from yesterday and this morning.

*The Falcons pulled off a great trade by getting Tony Gonzalez. The receivers started to come up big this year (you know, with a QB actually throwing them the ball instead of running around looking to make appearances on NFL Films) but the presence of a big pass catching tight end might just complete their offense. Run oriented offense with great play action ability; try defending that NFC South.

*A few weeks back, I had started a piece on the Chicago Bears and what the acquisition of Jay Cutler might do for them. I was never able to finish it because I'm not really sure of the total impact he will have on that team. For instance, will he able to lead that team? Will guys like Urlacher defer to him as the leader? Or will Cutler be the follower? Remember that Lil' Romeo-Lil' Bow Wow type beef that Cutler had with Philip Rivers? Didn't it strike you as shocking that no one on the Broncos defense tried to Rivers' head off just for messing with their QB?

*I went out with my man Money last night and caught was supposed to be (as predicted by yours truly) a phenomenal performance by the Chicago Bulls. Turns out the Celtics came in to the Chi feeling more comfortable then Common and Kanye in live performance in their hometown. Boston blew the roof off on the young Bulls and now have their swagger back. I'm expecting a Game 4 that will resemble Game 2 of the Nuggets-Hornets series. A lot of body blows, a lot of posturing, a lot of talking but one guy might get ejected. Where's Andres Nocioni when you need him? By the way, Tony Allen has been receiving death threats; isn't it at least possible that they're coming from ESPN's Sports Guy, the immortal Bill Simmons?

*Lakers lose, Lakers lose, Lakers lose!!! The mighty Lakers fell in Utah last night thanks in large part to Carlos Boozer’s 23 points and 22 rebounds. Let’s see how he Lake Show bounces back in Game 4. I can’t see Kobe stinking up the joint again. I thought it was funny that they gave credit to Ronnie Brewer for his defense on Kobe. Let’s be real, Kobe missed some shots he usually makes; for this and this alone, he might torch the kid in Game 4 and shatter his confidence. If they ever remake something in the mold of Dave Chappelle; Charlie Murphy and Chappelle will play the part of Kobe and Karl Malone. “I’m Kobe Bryant bitch!”. Kobe will be doing this while Malone hooks up with his wife. Low blow I know.

*What are you guys listening to in your car or Ipod? Please let me know. I'll put it up on the site. Currently, I'm listening to the hot ish on my Ipod. The tracks in heavy rotation start off as such:
"I spit hot fiya man. Who are the 5 greatest rappers of all time? Dylan.....Dylan.....Dylan....Dylan....Dylan. A rapaampampamapam!"

*Seriously, right now I am listening to
Eminem - 3 A.M.
Ludacris - Drinkin & Drivin
Royce da 5'9 - Royce is like
Royce da 5'9 - Slaughter
Royce da 5'9 - Bar Exam 3
Make sure to cop the Bar Exam 3 mixtape/album by Royce!!!

Heat-Hawks Live Blog Game 2

After racing home folks, I decided to hook you guys up with a live blog of the 2nd half of Game 2 of the Heat-Hawks series. I know, I spoil you guys, on with the show.


3rd Quarter 

11:20 mark

Jermaine O'Neal hits a turnaround jumper. Welcome to the 2009 NBA playoffs J.O.


9:51 mark

O'Neal is at the free throw line and the Hawks players must be wondering how the frik come they won by 26 points in Game 1 and yet they are now now by 17 points.

Blame American Pimp participant Mike Woodson.


9:06 mark

Joe Johnson picks up his 4th foul on a questionable call. The crowd groans in disgust. But can any one tell me why Johnson (Atlanta's best player ) was guarding Wade when he already had three fouls? Ask the American Pimp.

7:10 mark

Mike Bibby makes a jumper to cuts the lead to 10 points. The crowd is now into the game and getting amped up. All we need is some Lil' John and his crunk sound and this might turn into a cluhb event. By the way, every time Marvin Williams scores, I keep asking myself how Atlanta passed up on Chris Paul for Williams. I mean, it's not like the Hawks have athletic players running the fastbreak right? Atliens (Never meant to make your daughter cry, I apologize a trillion times, I'm sorry Ms Jackson, Ouhh) have a bunch of guys that can't create their shots (except for Joe Joe) but can finish when given the ball around the basket; wouldn't the best passing point guard in the league have been a great option? Back to the game.


4:52 mark

Wade is such a great player that he stayed in the gym to practice and jumper and develop a three point shot. The problem with that? He's starting to get Vince Carter syndrome.


3:27 mark

Signs your career as an NBA center is coming to an end: when you can't post up Josh Smith who really is a small forward. Jermaine, I'm talking to you right now.


2:50 mark

Josh Smith scores a basket and gets fouled. Then he hits his chest and let's the rest of the basketball world know he's the man and that he's got tons of swagger. DJ Khaled will soon contact him to be on the remix of Swag Surfin. They just showed a shot of Bill Smith, Mike Woodson's high school coach and they went on about how he knew back then he would be a future coach. Well did Smith teach Woodson how to dress up like a pimp? These are the things TNT should be answering. By the way, does Mike Woodson really wear that phat ass ring everywhere he goes? If he does, people should ask around who he is affiliated with.


1:20 mark

I just realized Magloire is in the game!!! Toronto stand up! You guys are now represented in the NBA playoffs.


0:00 mark

Right at the end of the third quarter, Flip (no relation to Lil ' Flip or Flip Saunders or motherflip you) Murray hits a three that makes the score 83-72 in favor of Miami. Quick observation: If Wade keeps giving up the ball and then goes running back to get it to try and score, how much confidence does that really inspire in his teammates? Remember, that used to be the Lakers offense after Shaq left town, and well L.A. only got out the first round after Kobe started trusting his guys. Just something worth pointing out.

4th Quarter

11:15  mark

Josh Smith gets a put back. If i were coaching him, I'd tell him to stay one foot outside the paint and not to move. Throw the ball up to him for an oop or let him crash the boards. I guarantee that works.


10:15 mark

Just as I say that, Josh Smith goes tough guy on Magloire and pushes him after he fouls Murray on a lay up attempt. I would love to know how much street cred SMith has in Atlanta (he grew up in the area), and if the real thugs endorse him.


8:24 mark

Impressive lay up by Michael Beasley. He sized up Horford on the wing, jabbed, then went baseline for a tough reverse lay in. This kid has a future in the league as a scorer, no question.


7:48 mark

See what I mean? Wade dribbled and went no where while double teamed and it led to a shot clock violation. Trust your guys.


5:33 mark

Vince Carter uhh I mean Dwyane Wade misses a contested three.


4:54 mark

Wade picks up 5th foul and gives up three point play.


4:11 mark

The Hawks run my play: give it to Smith next to the basket and watch him score.


3:40 mark

Some people say playoff experience is overrated. Well I watch Haslem make two huge jumpers with Wade on the bench and respectfully disagree.


2:37 mark

I'm all for superstars playing like superstars; but what a horrible shot by Wade that just went in. He went dribble, dribble, cross, look at teammates, dribble, cross, fade away three of the board. Had Kobe Bryant done that, people would want him banned from the basketball. I'm just calling it like it is. But still, what a performance by #3. If Wade were a rap album right now, I might go with Dr. Dre's Chronic 2001.


1:30 mark

Can someone please tell Mike Woodson that his goatee is not pimpin' ? It's way to thick. He is going to have to trim it up some. SBG offers fantastic line ups ladies and gentlemen. Mind you we do have a strict no refund policy. Should I keep talking about the game at this point? Thirteen point lead for Miami. I can hear T.I. right now singing for Wade: 

Three point shots,

playing connect the dots,

Baby you can have whatever you like......YEAH!


Heat win 108-93

Series tied 1-1



Philly previews Rockets-Blazers

Over the past decade I’ve been tormented by a concept that seems to go over everybody’s head. Coming from a basketball background, I’ve always thought a team is always better then an individual. Even if the talent or knowledge level is not equal, better players can USE less talented players with dedication to do the dirty work ( sort of AI’s life). I thought that this concept could also work in my second love aka rap music (note that I did not use the term hip hop). My favorite squadron was the Wu, they had a crazy entertaining guy in ODB, they had the street conglomerate in Ghost n Chef ( btw top 5 dead or alive in no particular order ; BIG, Hova, Pac, Snoop n Ghost), they had the intellectual craftsman with the Inspectah, they had a player/coach in RZA and they had talent in Meth (I didn’t forget U-God, he’s the Louis Amundson of this ish aka Mark Madsen aka we let you get 2 bars in cuz you da travelling pharmacist ) . When Wu had just come out , Meth was the ish and on the strength of that he dropped a solo and he was even better. Now for the most part, you guys (or guy according to my cousin I only have one fan) are thinking “we know the whole Wu story son!” but I don’t care I’m making a comparison. T-mac is to Houston what Meth has become, a nice hook guy with no lyrical substance aka a nice scorer who makes his teammates worse.

Rockets 101- Blazers 94

Celtics in trouble?

The Celtics showed their championship swagger when they came back to tie the series 1-1 with a win at home against the Chicago Bulls last night. With Leon Powe going down, they needed a boost of some sort (you know, kind of like the type of boost that some wrestlers from some world famous wrestling company use, I can't make it any clearer then that) and got it in the form of Glenn "Big Baby" Davis. So hats off to the champs for getting it done. However, there is always another side to the coin (and I'm not talking about the coin Two Face uses in the Dark Knight), think about it, should Chicago really have been in that game?

With their playoff lives on the line, Boston should have come out and blown the roof off on the Bulls. Remember how Atlanta just kept getting shaken like a salt shaker (SHAKE IT LIKE A SALT SHAKER!! Where are the Ying Yang Twins?) when they played in Boston in the lat year's playoffs? Believe me,I understand the impact of not having KG on the court, but are the Celtics really just an average home team now? Home crowds are supposed to intimidate young teams. Then add to that the fact that Rondo had a triple double after three quarters, Jesus becoming Jesus again with 30 points, Pierce coming out with a decent 18 points, Kendrick Perkins getting a double double, Big Baby playing like KG; and I have to bring forth this question: are the Celtics in trouble now that they are going to Chicago?

Contract Gordon hit up Boston for 42 tough points (making one tough jumper after another, truly a great performance), Tyrus Thomas blocked whatever came his way and Brad Miller had a decent game for the Bulls (mind you, he did have a couple of bad turnovers in crucial moments of the game) and John Salmons was himself; which means he did some good things but also did some things that I couldn't understand, kind of like DMX. The point I'm trying to make folks, Chicago has some confidence right now and I'm not talking about "we can hang" confidence, I'm talking about "Boston's ass is ours" confidence. The Celtics now face a must win Game 3. Sound premature? Just remember that young teams tend two levels higher at home. Can Boston really compete with Chicago if the Bulls play at a level higher then what we saw in Boston? This is the part in the Notorious movie where Tupac gets shot up while entering Biggie's building; things just were never the same again. Hopefully, the Celtics can come up with a “Hit’em up” performance in Game 3 and then Chicago can give them “Who Shot Ya” in Game 4 which would give us a great Game 5. A dude can dream right?

Get Rich or Die Tryin'

During the course of the weekend, I copped what was a huge album at the the time; 50's Get Rich or Die Tryin album. After several mixtapes taking creative shots at public figures and rap stars, Fif came out blazing with this album and shook up the rap game. So after listening to some tracks early this morning, I decided to try to associate songs form the album to the current NBA playoff series. Some songs captured some of the NBA teams perfectly and therefore I had to put the songs just for the teams themselves instead of the series. Give it a look.


What up Gangsta

"What up blood, what up cuz, what up blood, what up gangsta!"

To the Denver Nuggets that pushed around the New Orleans Hornets Sunday night in Denver. They came out physical trying to push around Tyson Chandler and David West. And you know what? It worked brilliantly. Granted I only saw the first half of the game, but Chris Paul was the only guy that looked like he belonged. He kept probing the defense and creating open shots for his teammates. But Chandler and West essentially were shown a "No Trespassing" sign which they decided to abide by. Not a good sign for the Hornets if they hope to win this series.


Many Men

"Many men, wish death upon me..."

This goes to the Houston Rockets. Everybody outside the city of Houston (except for Jeff Van Gundy that predicted that the Rockets would blow out the Blazers) predicted the demise of the Rockets at the hands of the Trail Blazers. Many men didn't necessarily wish death on Houston, but rather predicted it because they all thought that Portland had top dog status over H-Town. Well the Rockets took that disrespect and went into the Rose Garden and blew out the home team. I highly doubt the same thing happens again in Game 2, but it should make for some interesting basketball. Portland now knows what to expect in terms of playoff basketball.


If I can't

"If I can't do it, homie it can't be done, Ima let the champagne bottles pop, fo sho I'ma make it hot baby."

LeBron James's performance versus Detroit. Nuff said.


21 Questions

"If i didn't smile so much would you still like me?

With my huge arms and body, do I get scary?

I try to intimidate but does it really work?

Cuz like you saw with Krypto-Nate, I can get my feelings hurt.

When I dunk hard I know it drives people crazy,

But don't you think losing to the Sixers make a dude feel lonely?

To get to the second round I'll put the team on my back,

Cuz I love ballin like a crackhead loves crack.

Do you believe me when I say that?

Cuz Orlando is where Game 2 will be at...."

Not really 21 questions but you guys can invent more.


Back Down

"It's easy to see when you look at me that 50 don't back down..."

This goes  to the Utah Jazz. The world expects the Lakers to win, but that doesn't mean that the Jazz have to play dead on the court. Although the game got out of control for them in certain stretches, they still hung in there (unlike Miami, Portland and New Orleans) and made the score at least respectable. Jerry Sloan preaches toughness and will accept nothing less from his team. Way to get results from his over matched team.


P.I.M.P.

But then again, the Lakers did what they had to do. They came out P.I.M.P. style....

"I ain't that n*gga tryin' to holla cuz I want some head, I'm that n*igga tryin to holla cuz I want some bread..."

According to the experts, the Los Angeles Lakers are supposed to win their series against Utah easily. And you know what? They came out in Game 1 all business and took care of things on their home court. Great teams act like professionals, the Lakers did just that in their playoff opener.


Patiently Waiting

"50 fear no man, warrior, swing swords like Conan"

This one goes out to Rick Rose who looked at the defending champions and spat in their collective faces with his performance. Officer Ricky put himself on the map with 36 points and 11 assists. The only weakness in Ricky's game was his post game interview. The kid came off as quiet, humble but nervous as hell. That being said, Ricky had been "Patiently Waiting for a track to explode on"


Wanksta

"Dammmmmmmn homie, in high school you was da man homieeeeeee, f*ck happen to you?"

Straight up, that goes out to Jermaine O'Neal of the Miami Heat. Seriously, he couldn't be bothered to show up against Atlanta: 5 points, 2 rebounds, 3 turnovers. And yes, he was one of those straight from high school to the NBA guys that was really good. What happened to you?


In da club

"Go shawty, it's your birthday, we gonna party like it's your birthday, we gonna sip Bacardi like it's your birthday and you know we don't give a f*ck if it's not yo birthday"

The Dallas Mavericks have caught the Spurs at the perfect time. San Antonio is banged up and for some reason seemed mentally drained. How else do you explain all the wide open looks that Dallas got? The reason I chose "In da club" for the Mavs was that they couldn't miss at one point. No matter what they did, they would score. Open three, cash that. Out of control lay up? Put back by Erick Dampier. Great job by Dallas. Let's see how they fare in Game 2.


High all the time

"I stay high all the time, I got the good sh*t..."

The San Antonio Spurs looked lost defensively. If this were an episode of Prison Break, all the guards would have left their post while half the inmates try to escape and the other half try to take advantage of the skinny and pretty prisoners. The Spurs basically seemed high.


Don't push me

"I need you to pray me, I need you to care for me, I need you to want me to win, cuz I know where I'm headed cuz I know where I been"

The Detroit Pistons have had a good run. Hell, they might even win a game or two in this series, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out that this team will be gutted at the end of the season. Joe Dumars has been practicing for few weeks now with his fingers just so he can give the peace sign to Rasheed Wallace and Allen Iverson (expiring contracts); but we all can see that Detroit is on the edge and don't want to be pushed.


Life's on the line

"I let my walk talk for me, my whip talk for my gat talk for me, BOHW waddup homie?"

The Boston Celtics keep reminding the world that they are the champs ad we shouldn't underestimate them and that with or without KG, they still intend to defend their crown. That's all good and all, but at some point, you have to leave the title behind and start talking about the present and start doing things that got you a championship. Talking wasn't one of them.


Heat

"Catch you slippin, I'ma kill you..."

The Sixers sure caught the Magic off guard huh? Maybe Shaq was right when he said Stan Van Gundy was the master of panic. Orlando was up 18 points and then slipped up a little. The rest as they say is history.



Miami @ Atlanta Game 1

Pregame

"From the slums of Shaolin, Wu-Tang Clan strikes again, the Rza, the Gza, Ol' Dirty Bastard, Inspectah Deck, U-God...." My bad, wrong channel, wrong network. I was watching BET. Let's flip it over to the Score (Canadian sports channel broadcasting the game) and see what's happening. It's the NBA on TNT!!! The 76ers are hanging with the Magic in the fourth quarter. Do I live blog the rest of the game? Hell to the nah but I can still give some insight.


*Are we really sure that the Sixers want to win this game?They should be picking up every loose ball. ALL OF THEM. Right now, Orlando is showing Philadelphia that they can't hang. The magic are executing and keep getting the Sixers into bad match ups.


*TNT splits the screens and shows Josh Smith chest bumping some of his teammates.  I'm not sure, but I think he took both of the guys he chest bumped out.


22.3 seconds left

Philly has the ball with a chance to win the game.


12.5 seconds

The Sixers coach calls timeout despite the fact that Iguodala had the ball in his hands with court spread out. I mention this because he will probably set up a play that will get Iggy exactly in the same spot where he was. WATCH.


02.2 seconds

Ridiculous shot by Iggy. But you see what I meant? They set up a play in which they almost didn't inbound the ball in time to get Iguodala back in the same situation he had before. NBA coach trying to justify his salary you have to think.


*The Sixers draw first blood. Off we go to Atlanta for our featured game.


1st Quarter

7:28 mark

I already missed some of the game. I feel cheated. Man, Mike Woodson looks like a guy that was on the documentary American Pimp with that huge ass ring.


6:40 mark

Man, Joe Johnson knows how to score. Obviously it helps when you're not guarded by an elite defensive player.


4:38 mark

Expect a huge series from Joe Johnson if James Jones is going to be the guy guarding him. Bring in Jamario Moon and see what he can do. Michael Beasley is looking right now. No deer in the headlights.  He looks like he's ready for the playoffs.


3:28 mark

Flip Murray comes in to the game. I immediately realize he looks like Superstar's friend, Moise. Random observation: You know how in the 100 meter dash, the guy that finishes second in the race gets stuck watching the back of the guy that finishes first at the end of the race? Well in one of the most famous races ever, Michael Johnson finished second to Donovan Bailey (after pulling his hamstring). Wondering where this is going right? Well, let's just say I will refer to James Jones now as Michael Johnson because he keeps getting left behind by Joe Joe.


Score after one quarter: Atlanta 24-21


2nd Quarter

11;22 mark

Chalmers draws a foul on Horford. But I wonder, how far can a rookie point guard take a team with no inside game?Atlanta must be thinking: "not far."


9:20 mark

I feel like I'm watching ESPN Classic. Dwyane Wade is looking like the guy that completely destroyed the Dallas Mavericks in the 2006 Finals. Say what you want about how the refs helped him, but Wade got to whatever spot on the court he wanted and then got fouled. That's what we're seeing right now.


8:11 mark

I just saw T.I. behind the Heat bench trying to broker an arms deal. Ok fine, I'm kidding, he was just watching the game with his stunna shades. I have trouble watching games with my regular eyes, imagine with sunglasses. 

Quick commercial break: For all you people from the States, I would encourage you to go on Youtube and type in Cabbie in the Street. There are a couple of episodes with Kobe Bryant. Just trust me.


6:08 mark

Beasley has gotten shot happy, that's not a good thing.


5:07 mark

After a great display of hustle from both teams, Wade nearly loses his mind at the ref. The ref responds: "If you passed the ball a little more, I might give you a call or two, I put my money on you guys to win!" Just jokes peoples. Miami calls timeout. Call me crazy, but I think that the timeout was a little premature. Then I realize how many inexperienced players are on the floor, and it all makes sense to me. That's why Spoelstra is coaching in the NBA and I'm coaching in NBA 2K9.


4:01 mark

Beasley fires up another bad shot and doesn't get back on defense. Josh Smith sprints down court and catches the oop from Bibby.


1:25 mark

Atlanta is handling Miami. Score 55-36. On a brighter note, Miami's defense has gotten better; Joe Johnson "only" has 11 points. Everybody else is scoring though. This game tape is not going to help anyone on the Heat in future contract negotiations. It will help the current Hawks players though.


Halftime

Atlanta leads 59-39. Wade races into the locker room and calls the #1 guy in his top five: Charles Barkley. The Chuckster starts laughing and tells him it serves him right for not letting him reset the game of NBA 2K9 after Dwight got hurt. Wade asks for advice and Charles tells him he knows a good stripper in the A. Flash takes down the number and then listen to his head coach scream at them.


3rd Quarter

11:07 mark

Bibby hits a three and Miami comes back and turns the ball over on a shot clock violation.


10:00 mark

Miami put Wade on Joe Johnson late in the second quarter and stick with same strategy here. One problem though on this possession, Wade doesn't box out and Johnson goes straight to the glass and gets a put back. Wade looks around for someone to blame until he realizes Johnson is his guy.


6:42 mark

Have the Heat players played together before?


4:40 mark

Montreal's own, Joel Anthony (former Dawson College player) gets a rebound. He wanted to be part of the SBG but we turned him down. That statement fact or fiction?

3:40 mark

Josh Smith steps on the air and gets a thunderous put back. The Heat call timeout. Wade checks with his agent to see if he can get out of his contract before 2010. His agent says no. Wade says the NBA is trying to screw him and commits to signing with the Knicks in 2010. SBG player Ralph gets giddy. Then Wade realizes the Knicks suck and then says never mind, I'm going to Cleveland.


2:18 mark

The Atlanta lead is down to 19. American Pimp calls timeout.


Score after 3: Atlanta 76-57.


4th Quarter

10:00 mark

Is Atlanta's offensive execution that good, or is Miami's defense that bad? Right now I'd say the Heat defense sucks. Quick cameo by Jamaal Magloire on the Heat bench. I wonder, do Magloire and Anthony always go head to head at practice and say their hood is better?

Anthony: Montreal better, we have ballers

Magloire: Toronto is way better, we have better players.

Anothny: That's exactly what I think when coach keeps asking me to sub in the game and leaves you on the bench no matter how bad we're winning or losing.


6:52 mark

The SBG live blogging experience is in jeopardy for the night right now.


5:30 mark 

SBG hotline rings. The live blogging is on pause.


Blogging time is done. This game has nothing more to offer.


Victory

The Silverback Gorillas entered Sunday's contest against the Granby Express needing a 19 point win in order to clinch the #2 seed in the playoffs. We started off the game a little sloppy because we lacked focus but our defense was good enough to force a couple of turnovers and an 18-10 lead after the first quarter. The second half was more of the same; we were able to create some steals but still had trouble scoring. We had trouble figuring out their 1-3-1 zone defense. Then at some point we figured that if we got the ball to our best post passer (Randy), we would be able to create some scoring opportunities. Wouldn't you know, Randy got the ball inside and kept finding guys at the weirdest passing angles which got us going a little. Then Robocop picked up his third foul and had to sit out the remainder of the quarter. However, we had pulled a Lil' Wayne and Baby move on them: no matter how much you don't want to think about it, the obvious is out there for all to see (you know, like the Weezy Kiss), we're starting to figure them out. We went into halftime leading 34-21. So the Express did the smart thing and switched up their defense to start the third quarter. They figured they would have more success by defending us man to man. Well, turns out their strategy worked just as well as Portland's defensive strategy on Yao Ming. We raced out to a 48-28 lead by the middle of the third and we figured we just needed to play hard the rest of the way and we'd clinch the #2 seed running away.


One problem, we became lackadaisical and started thinking about hitting the cluhb later in the evening (the guys won't ever admit to it, but I know better; ask Q, he knows what's popping tonight) and Granby came storming back.The score after three quarters was 49-40 in favor of your SBG. We figured that it would be a good time to start playing our A game again and execute our offense. But for some reason, our offense turned into Michael Jackson live on stage: one guy doing it all, and everybody watching. Let me break down the first few possessions: dribble, dribble, shot, brick; dribble, hesitation move, dribble, juke, shot, brick. In the meantime, Granby had gained some confidence and starting getting loud in OUR gym. They blocked three shots in a row and started showing their country swagger (ey man, Granby is a country hood, I'm not hating, just stating the facts). With the game hanging (about 5:30 left on game clock) in the balance and the score 49-42, we raced up the court and got the ball to G-No who the dunk the ish out of the ball. The Granby bigs did the wise move and didn't bother trying to contest his dunk. The game was over at this point. Superstar got hot and started scoring from all angles (mostly from three) and Pirate went in for a couple of lay ups. The SBG swag was in full effect. We ended the game and did our Gorilla chant like we do after every win and called it a day. Qwest and Superstar started to talk about hitting the cluhb (SEE, I TOLD YOU!!) and who would make it out there; that should be its own column....maybe one day it will be. 

Final score: SBG wins 70-59. we won exactly by 19 points and locked up the #2 seed for the playoffs. Quick FYI, I know i wrote that our last two games were playoff games, but it's a little more complicated then that. Because one of the playoff teams got kicked out, we were asked to play two games in order to re-seed all the teams. Just thought you guys might like to know. Next weekend will be big. It will determine the participants of the semi-finals and finals. Keep tuning in throughout the week.

SBGTV

Houston @ Portland live. Game 1

Houston @ Portland

Game 1

Yao gives Oden a dap before the tip and they both fall to ground with weird severe injuries that will keep them out of basketball until January 2010.....Just kidding.


1st Quarter

11:48 mark

The Portland crowd is so loud that I'm intimidated.


11:01 mark

Score: Yao 5, Portland 0.


9:50 mark

Welcome to the playoffs. The Blazers get their first points of the 2009 playoffs.

Score: Houston 9-2


8:37 mark

Portland seems a little rattled. They are like Biggie in Los Angeles after the ish hit the fan with Tupac. They had no idea what to expect. They call a timeout to regroup. They Yao we're seeing right now after four minutes of play is a franchise center. Just remember it's only been four minutes, he has time to come back to earth.


8:10 mark

Possibly the biggest moment in the Blazers season so far, Brandon Roy going right at Artest, Battier and Yao for a left handed lay up. He is in no way shook. Let's get rid of the Mobb Deep song that was playing in my background (Shook Ones).


5:43 mark

Man, I've been dying to see Yao be dominant like tonight. Great centers are joy to watch. 14 points for the center.


2:03 mark

Houston is amazingly pushing the pace on Portland. They are getting whatever they want. Houston up 30-20. Timeout Portland. We need Oden to come in, get two quick fouls and go back to the bench. I say it jokingly, but watch, that's how it's going to go down.Houston comes up with the best defensive play of the night, they sit Yao for some rest.


Score at end of 1st: Houston 34-23. LaMarcus Aldridge is struggling and I picked him on my postseason fantasy team.


2nd Quarter

11:11 mark

Oden scores his first ever playoff basket and gets fouled in the process. 


10:54 mark

Mutombo knows how to clean up the boards. Great positioning and boxing out by the the 45 year old. I wonder if he chills with A.C. Green. Seriously, think about , who else in the NBA would Mutombo have chilled with in the NBA?


8:36 mark

The match up I wanted, Yao vs Oden. Oden fouls Yao away from the foul and grabs his own genitals and says: "You'll have your mouth on these by the end of the game China Man". Ok, I made that up.


7:44 mark

Oden picks up his second foul. And you guys doubted my ability to read into the future.


7:07 mark

Fernandez crashes into Yao and scores. And one. Yao picks up his second foul. Somewhere in Houston, TMac is worried. If Houston gets out the first round without him, what happens to him? That knee might magically become healthy by Game 6.


10.9 mark

Who wants this game more you think?  The veteran Houston squad seems to me like a team desperate to win; a team hardened by tough losses. Mind you, Portland's inability to defend Yao is a huge reason why Houston is up. Giving up 60 points in the first half at home? Bad sign.


Halftime

Yao has 24 points and 7 rebounds

3rd Quarter

10:28 mark

24 point lead for Houston. Did Brandon Roy come to the game alone? Maybe the rest of the Blazers don't realize this is a big game.


6:45 mark

Amazing left handed  finish by Roy over Yao.


6:28 mark

21 point lead by Houston but Yao just picked up his fourth foul. Does Adelman blink? Does Artest decide it's his time to shine? It's only a matter of time before Ron Ron decides that Ron Ron needs to carry the team because Ron Ron is the best option right now. Am i crazy for talking like Ron Ron? Cuz you know, that's just what Ron Ron would do, cuz you know, he's Ron Ron.


5:43 mark

So Travis Outlaw has the ball on the wing and sees Ron Ron guarding Oden in the post. The proper basketball play is to give Oden the ball so that he can overpower Artest or you run a pick roll because the players involved aren't usually in a situation where they have to defend a wing and post player in a pick and roll. So what does Outlaw do? He fires away a contested jumper. Yup, that's how you come back from a 21 point deficit.


4:00 mark

Most computer application or program has a help section that you can access in case you're not sure how to get a task accomplished or you just need some clarity. Right now Brandon Roy is looking for his help section.


1:32 mark

The live blogging experience is in jeopardy right now considering the 82-56 score. Mutombo swiped away Roy's shot on a dunk attempt and gave the finger wag. Would love to see him challenge Josh Smith: "I try to block Smith shot but get dunked on. Josh great dunker but better players dunk on me." SBG would have agreed with such a statement if it were made.


4th Quarter

9:19 mark

The lone bright spot right now for the Blazers (besides Roy) is Oden's performance. He is pushing around Mutombo like Shaq did in the 2001 Finals. Oden tells Mutombo: " Take it like a man Dike! By the way, that guy you had me talk to was great. He helped me out with my papers and all. No one will ever know that we're both about the same age; good looking out playa."


7:08 mark

This game in danger of getting turned off right now. Maybe go hit the cluhb (purposely spelled this way) or something. This is really pathetic.


6:06 mark

Realized that ain't no cluhb popping right now. So I'm stuck watching this game. Let's call this one early. Game Blouses.


5:27 mark

Chappelle called and told me to stop using his jokes. He seems to forget that he stole that joke from me. Comedians think they have it better then the rest of us I tell you. If you're still expecting game info, go to ESPN.COM or NBA.COM. I am in full fledged ramble mode right now. So SBG has a playoff game tomorrow @ 2:30 pm. Come watch us. I know the Lakers will be on TV, but we're far more entertaining.


3:52 mark

Brent barry gets a backdoor cut and dunks. Dude barely jumps when he shoots, but can still throw it down. Go figure.


Ok, we're wrapping this one up early. Tune in tomorrow night to see what we have for you here at SBG. Have a great evening folks