A Day Inside The Mind Of Allen Iverson

Hi, my name is Allen Iverson,
But I bet you already knew that. Right now, there is something wrong with the NBA. All I have done for the past 14 years is lay it all on the line during games and play to the best of my abilities. And yet, it seems as though no one respects my game anymore. I feel like back in high school, when I was wrongfully prosecuted and eventually released (you’ve seen my story on ESPN’s 30 for 20 documentary); the odds are getting stacked against me, but I will prevail.

For some reason, NBA general managers don’t seem to like the swagger I bring to the basketball court. How else do you explain the fact that no one wants to return my calls? Look at my credentials:

-11 NBA All-Star selections
-1996-97 NBA Rookie of the Year
-2000-01 NBA All-Star Game MVP
-2000-01 NBA MVP
-2004-05 All-Star Game MVP
-6th all time in points per game (26.7 PPG)
-7th all time in steals per game (2.2 SPG)
-22nd all time in total points scored (24,368 points)
-45th al time in assists per game (6.2 APG)

Let’s be honest, I’m going to the Hall of Fame baby. So what if I’ve only made eight playoff appearances? Who cares right? It’s clear to me that when I’m on my game, my teams win. I’m not a big fan of practice and anything that’s a bit too team oriented, but if you make sure to always focus on just me, I’ll always play to the best of my abilities. Seriously, every now and then, I might light up the scoreboard as I make jump shots rain from all over the place. But please understand, it’s all about me though.

As a dude that’s a big fan of music, I feel that the song that best captures my abilities is Tie Me Down by the New Boyz. They sing about how no one can lock them up and I feel that that describes Allen Iverson perfectly; doesn’t matter that they aren’t talking about basketball.

Now that I think about it, maybe the big fuss that these GMs have is that they don’t like the fact that I roll with a posse and that I have exhibited a destructive behavior at every stop I’ve made…Nah, forget that! No way in hell! I’m Allen Iverson. I’ve been to the Finals baby! Hell, no disrespect to Chris Webber and his dudes, but I was and still am the biggest generational shift in basketball. The Fab Five was good but they didn’t have my crossover, my braids or my tattoos. I started a new movement; I made the league what it is today.

 If people in the NBA are too stubborn to see just how great I am, maybe it’s time I went elsewhere so people can appreciate my talent. Call Kobe, call Yao and call that other baldheaded dude…..his name escapes me right now…..Steve? No that’s not it. DeShawn maybe? Nah. Whatever. I’m talking about the dude that ate Vaseline and cried on webcam [his yes man says: Stephon Marbury]. Yes, that dude; call all those dudes up and tell them there’s about to be a hostile takeover in China because Allen Iverson is far too great to not be playing basketball….


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